Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Welcome back Taste buds!

Today sucked! I've been sick with a Cold (courtesy of my office-mates) since last Thursday. And, only because we will be traveling to see Brandon in less than 10 days did I agree to give up on my usual bag of Holistic cures and decided to go see a White coat instead. 

Of course, my doctor took one look at me and Confirmed what I already knew, saying You, my dear, are not well, which I think is bed-side manner code for, You look like hell! I can't imagine what gave it away... Was it my Glassy eye, drippy nose, my Inability to speak or could it have been all the answers I gave her PA before she walked in? Any way, after asking me a bunch of additional Questions and confirming that I had a fever, my Doctor prescribed a load of synthetic Poisons and sent me on my way. 

Of course, I decided to take my cold back to where it could feel more Comfortable. No, not to bed... To work, where it came from! And, until this morning that was fine... I have not felt too Sick not to be at work at all. In fact, on Monday, before I took these prescriptions and with a Throbbing sinus pain, I managed to lead an HbI cheer and send two of our Directors off to their VP's 8AM Staff meeting laughing! But again, that was before I loaded my System with synthetic Poisons! Because this morning, day three of Popping, inhaling and drinking Poisons, I woke up at 2AM with a raging nose bleed and again at 6AM completely Wiped out and nauseous! And, not the good kind of nauseous you're Willing to put up with because of all the Fabulous cruise buffet food! 

Still, I pushed all the way through Hot rollers to pantyhose and made it to my doctor's office before the walk-in Clinic ended at 7:30AM. A nurse Checked my blood pressure and blamed it being a, little high on the Fact that I'd previously been taking over-the-counter stuff before I got the, real medicines on Monday. Couldn't be all that Poison the doctor prescribed me... Oh, no! So knowing my nose bleed was No big deal and my blood pressure wasn't Up enough to cause alarm, I made my way to work. Although, I do not really remember the drive.

I thought a little Fruit would settle me down so I stopped at the Cafeteria for a cup of strawberries. I must have really been out of it because it didn't even Phase me when the cashier charged me $2.99 for six strawberries and the guy behind me got Away paying $1.60 for a container of Yoplait and a full cup of Granola. 

Nevertheless, I somehow managed to make it through the Elevator ride up to the Third floor and over to my desk without Tossing my cookies. Then, I sat down, turned on my computer, and POW! My face hit the trash can under my desk. Fortunately, the sweet man on the other side of my Pod wall is married and has three daughters so he's probably heard a Woman puke into a garbage can before. And, if not for the wife and three daughters, surely then from his College days at Carolina.     

Not wanting to waste my six, $3 strawberries, I called my doctor's office to ask about the worsening nausea before I ate them... Get this! The bottle does NOT say it, but it seems that I might be able to tolerate Amoxicillin better if I take it with, more food. Great! Just what every girl on a Diet and with no tastebuds wants to hear, Eat more food! So with the Mystery solved I decided to just have my $3 strawberries and make it through my workday. But it wasn't meant to be because I just couldn't stop throwing up or running to the Bathroom. Again... Nothing on the Rx bottle says to take Amoxicillin with food! It says only this: Some medications may decrease the effectiveness of birth control pills. Ask your pharmacist for more information. Which leads me to wonder how many people Feeling badly enough to need a ten-day supply of Amoxicillin are thinking about Sex. And, about how many woman would risk the Possibility of pregnancy on a Warning that includes a, may or may not clause? But I digress...

By noon I had to admit defeat so I tossed the Strawberries into my trash can, splashed some Cold water over my face, smoothed my, my-head-has-been-in-my-Trash-can-under-my-desk-all-morning hair, uncrossed my eyeballs and calmly and Slowly walked over to where my Boss sits. As hard as I prayed that he would be too busy to turn around, make eye contact with me and chat, that's just Not my boss... Nope. As usual, he spun around in his chair and Greeted me with his usual full attention and bright, cheerful smile, ready to hear all about it. I took the fact that his Smile didn't immediately turn into a frown and that his face didn't pucker up into a look of Shock at the way I looked that my efforts to hide the Fact that I'd been puking under my desk all morning was working. Of course, upon hearing that I wasn't feeling well, my Boss encouraged me to Drop everything and just go home. If he knew how Terrible I was really feeling, my boss probably would have taken away my keys because again, I don't remember the drive. But I made it home and have never been so Happy to undress and fall into bed in all my life! 

Now, after three pretty decent Naps, the constant urge to throw up has finally left me but I still have this feeling that if I were to break into a twirl I'd lose it. THE GOOD NEWS is that during my shower tonight I smelled Bodywash for the first time in a week, which means my sense of Taste is back! 

As tempted as I was to have a slice of Coconut cream pie or a few pieces of the Godiva chocolates I haven't been able to taste since I bought them, I decided to take it slow... And, because I could stand for more than five minutes without Tipping over, I even brewed him a Gallon of fresh sweet tea. After the tea was done I decided it had to be Grilled cheese! 

Nothing like Grilled Cheese and pickles to welcome Tastebuds back!
Yum! Melty cheese on soft white-Wheat bread
and a few cold German barrel pickles
No, I'm not pregnant because Amoxicillin may or may
not decrease the Effectiveness of birth control...
I'm just having Cheese and pickles because my Tastebuds are back! 

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